Mote-Evasion

"Only I can change my life.  No one can do it for me." 

~Carol Burnett~

    There are times in the lives of all people when a lack of motivation stops them in their tracks.  As a person ho struggles with mental illness, I find those times more frequently than I would like.  

   What is motivation?  A simplistic definition is a force that moves a person forward in the pursuit of their goals.  This force can be internal, like a driving need that will not be satisfied until the goal is reached.  Other times the force is external, like a crowd cheering a person forward to the common goal.  In life, most of us experience a combination of both internal and external motivation.  But what happens when motivation evades us?  How do we manage the lack of motivation that overtakes and envelops us?

    Personally, I had a recent flood of creativity followed by a complete lack of motivation that left me feeling really down.  It started with being ill and unable to eat much of anything then continued with physical pain. I found myself sleeping all the time, not answering texts or calls, not cooking or showering, not taking medication correctly, and feeling bored and uninspired. By the time I had no motivation to even look at facebook or check in with my accountability person, I knew I had fallen into depression.  That is what kills my motivation and energy more than anything else.  Couple this with my need to have a purpose and perfectionism and I become a dark lump of unmotivated KAT.  

    Perfectionism and depression are the assassins that chase my motivation away.   By identifying the motivation killers, and acknowledging them for a little while, I can form a new plan.  I am extremely fortunate to have a wonderful tribe, as well as a skills group that reminds me to be mindful of the things that are happening around and within me.

    My plan now is to wake and sleep on my previous set schedule, take my medications as I should, and find a different way to do the things that the pain in my body is currently stopping me from doing.  It seems over simplistic, I know.  What if you can't get to the point of identifying the source?  What if you "just don't feel good" and want to sleep all the time?

    This is where your tribe, your support system, comes into play.  Sometimes it's a nudge to sit up and have a conversation, a breakfast made by your roommate, an offer to go out of the house, even on a short trip.  Other times it might be more forceful, like a friend telling you that you stink and need to shower, or someone outside of yourself saying you seem depressed.  

    If all this doesn't help at least a small bit of motivation return to your life, then it's time to ask for professional help.  No matter how good I feel when I am motivated, I still need to maintain my support system for those times my motivation runs off.  This is true of anyone, not just mentally ill people.

    The quote above says, "It's a slow process, but quitting won't speed it up." Take the time you need to recover from your lack or motivation and the underlying issues but never give up!  Goals are dreams put into action.  Never stop dreaming.  Never stop asking for help when you need it.  Keep moving toward that goal, acting to make that dream a reality.  Know you are worth it and continue to usher your motivation back into a safe place where it can grow and thrive, away from the assassins that threaten it.

~ A note to my readers.  I  write the quote beneath or above the meme for those who use screen readers or cannot view images~